Friday, 31 January 2014

Just what type-o post is this...?

Typos. Gotta love 'em. Sometimes they work in your favour, more often than not... emm... not. But let's face it, on the rare occasion when they do, they should really be celebrated, because quite frankly, you're going to get burned by them 98.3% of the time (little known fact that. Also made up on the spot). So... in order to keep a record of fortuitous typos, and now that I have a shiny new blog <blows hot breath onto his elbow and gives blog a little rub>, I thought I'd keep a log. I can't take credit for all of these of course, but, you know what, I can always just turn comments off and claim credit for all of them - so who's gonna argue? Bam! That's a win right there.

I'll update this with more if I happen to stumble across them, and hopefully one day some of them will make it into the mainstream pop culture and I'll make my millions. That'll be the end of this blog my friends, as I'll no longer need an audience (he said, actively insulting the one person actually reading this).

Anyway, enough rambling, so far my favourites have been (and these are presented in no particular order):

 adjective \sˈek-s(ə-)lənt\

Usage: - "That's sexcellent news."

For when news is really great and can only be described by comparing it to excellent sex.

Origin: an instant message to a co-worker

Notes: More a "Note to self", be careful who I use this one with...

 noun \ˈmīt-ˌmer\

Usage: - "... what a bleemin' mightmare."

: For when things could potentially go horribly wrong, but might still turn a corner...

Origin: an instant message to a co-worker.

Notes: May be too early to tell how useful this one proves to be. Will keep the blog updated on this one*.

* If you believe that, I have a small car I'd like to sell you. One careful previous owner. Think she was a nun.


Usage: - "How flustrating was that?"

: For when things become so frustrating, the only thing you can do is get all flustered about it.

Origin: a mispronunciation to a co-worker which then became a valid word which both parties agreed could and should be used again.

Notes: Variations are welcome. Flustration, flustrated, to flustrate, etc. All valid and useful variations and all accepted without quibble**.

** written purely because I wanted to use the word 'quibble' and I don't get to say it much.

 adverb \ˈnā-bē also ˈne-\

Usage: - "That's a naybe, at least until I know more."

For when you want to say maybe, but don't have enough info just yet and have to make it a "nay" instead, until such time as things change.

Origin: stolen from a co-worker with a brighter mind than mine. 

Notes: Has the potential to be used often, with the added benefit of covering your bases - "w-e--e-ll... I did say naybe!".


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